Ashes Of Our Wake: Ritual For Hire


When a loved one dies, there are wounds that open on the surface of this earth. The ground shifts and quakes; splitting ties, breaking lines, leaving words never uttered to become burdens only the heart can speak. Whispers of unfulfilled promises, hugs never embraced, rage never uttered…

These are the Ashes of Our Wake.

There are tears that must be shed, rivers of sorrow that flow from the source of our love…
and the blackness that calls back to us, in Mother Death’s voice saying…

Give me your songs.
Pour your pain unto me.
I will hold them now.
I will keep them safe for you.
The wounds of the living must be burned into the ether.
Raise your voice and sing.
Raise your fist and scream.
Raise your chin…
and cry those holy, acidulous tears of transmutation.
Grieve, my child, and I will hold you both.
The dead will feel your saltwater sorrow within the depths of these cracks;
earthen fissures made to carry both the weight and the way through.
They will hear the echoes of your voice within my womb.
And you will see.
Oh, you will see…
This Death is not the end of We."
- Cris Ashburn, 2018 -

Ashes of Our Wake is a releasing ceremony designed for those who are grieving. This ritual provides a safe space and holds vigil the memory of your loved ones. 'Ashes of Our Wake' has been born out of my experiences as a Certified Death Midwife, Ordained Priestess, longtime ancestral worker, and loving daughter to a deceased father.

In my travels, I have become aware that there is often a spiritual component that is severely lacking in modern funerary practices, with the community support system often failing individuals. Many of us were never taught how to hold space for those who are grieving, as such the mourning process for the bereaved often stops at their front door.

Grief can affect people in various ways. The personal nature of how to deal with the loss of a loved one can leave them confused, isolated, bereft, resentful, feeling orphaned, and longing to be seen, held, and heard.

No one should feel alone.

This service is for those who have been pulled under by the overwhelming waves of emotion, those who wonder when- if ever -they will be able to come up for air, those who feel as if they've fallen between the cracks. Within these pools lie fissures of foundation that stretch upward towards us, leaking the promise of tomorrow. In the depths, we find that our lungs were made for more than air, made for more than tsunamis. To explore the crevices of your wounded heart space until the terrain becomes traversable again. To move soft fingers over raw edges and not apologize for them, to cleanse the suffering by bleeding the pain out.

This ritual session was specifically crafted for these experiences, to assist in midwifing the process of healing. It is a ceremonial space of deep release, unconditional acceptance, and support.

May the ashes of your wake be the very torch that lights your way.

'Ashes of Our Wake' is tailor designed for the individual and as such adapts with each person's needs. We will discuss your specific situation during the pre-ritual consult, so there's no need to worry about that.

This service comes with a minimum of 3 sessions, varying in number according to the person's needs: a pre-ritual consult session, at least one in-depth 'Ashes of Our Wake' ritual session, and a post-ritual wrap-up session. 

These sessions are held via video/voice chat on your choice of the following platforms: Zoom, Google Hangouts, Skype, or Facebook Messenger. 

During the course of 'Ashes of Our Wake' a ritual space will be held which often includes physical items such as candles, oils, herbs, tarot and oracle cards, crystals, talismans, and other magickal accruments. You may set a sacred space on your end should you wish, however it is not required of you.

I will contact you privately via your given email at the time of purchase to book our pre-ritual session. I will ask for your time zone, availability, and preferred chat platforms (Zoom, Google Hangouts, Skype, or Facebook). We will plan the rest from there. Following your purchase, please keep a very close eye on your inbox. I typically reply within two business days. 


  • Disclaimer

    Cris Ashburn is not a grief counselor, medical practitioner, nor a member of the funeral industry. Cris Ashburn's services are spirituality and support based. Please see the policy section of this website for more details on Cris Ashburn's policies and terms of service.

Ohio, United States |